by jellydonut25 » Sat Nov 07, 2015 1:07 am
I'm fried. Mentally, physically, and emotionally.
EVERY SINGLE NIGHT this week, one or both of my kids has just been MISERABLE. I'm not getting sleep. I'm also not sure I like my new job.
Every day the past two weeks has been:
-Wake up at 5:30 AM. Get myself ready, get the kids ready, take them to day care, go to work.
-Drive 90 minutes (or more) to the job site I'll be working at for the day.
-Get a variety of things accomplished, mostly less than I should, because I'm running my computer wifi off my phone, and being a new hire, I still have to set up all my stuff.
-SWEAT. I'm working outside a lot, wearing Nomex chemical spill resistant "clothing" because of working at chemical plants.
-Finally get home around 6 PM or later.
-Listen to my son scream, whine, cry, fuss, etc, pretty much the entire night. He was so good for the first few months, but he's just been HORRIBLE the past 3-4 weeks.
-Play with my daughter, a toddler with infinite energy, all night.
-My wife puts my son to bed while I get my daughter ready for bed.
-My son (almost as if he KNOWS) wakes up from being put down about an hour after my wife puts him down, which coincides almost exactly with me finally getting my daughter to sleep.
-Now, try to get my son to sleep, which usually takes several tries, sees me standing on my feet and my arm getting sore from having a fussy baby writhe around in it for an hour.
-Then my daughter wakes up SHRIEKING, from...I dunno...a nightmare? So I go and finally wrestle her back to sleep.
-Too fried and looking for some peace and quiet to actually go to sleep, so I watch a little TV or like half a movie.
-Finally go to bed around 1:30, where I have a hard time falling asleep because I've got about a third of the bed to try to get comfortable in.
Repeat.
4 or fewer hours of sleep.
Kids crying at me for 5 straight hours.
A job I don't know if I like. (I feel like...I didn't get a chemical engineering degree to have to be outside in the Houston heat. I don't mind occasional site work and such, but this seems too often...PLUS a horrid commute)
A manager I'm pretty sure I don't like (I don't think our personalities mesh, and I definitely don't like what I perceive as hand-holding, hovering, and mistrust; ie, today, the guy I normally work with at a site was going to be out in the morning and I had to pick up my company car in the afternoon, so we figured we'd just skip the day and I'd work from home for the morning. NOPE; my manager asked me to go down to the site this morning, so I drove all the way down there, but because I can't actually do any work [legally...I don't have all my background checks and security clearances approved yet] without this other guy there, she basically just sat with me while I was on my computer, doing what I would have been doing from home, only slower because a personal hotspot on my phone is slower than my at-home wifi...and a random conference room at a chemical plant is actually less conducive to getting anything done than setting up in a quiet room at home)
Don't get me wrong, I'd rather have a job that I'm not super thrilled with than no job at all, but not being able to unwind at all COMBINED with this job is just wearing me down.