by TitanoGoji16 » Sun Sep 05, 2010 9:48 pm
Piranha 3D. I'd been looking forward to this for a while. Looked like a good, fun, cheesy monster movie. But now that I've seen it, I'm not quite sure what I think of it.
- So, wait, Matt Hooper is taken out by some dinky piranha? The guy who took Jaws head-on and lived to tell the tale gets killed by some freakin' goldfish? Unacceptable! I refuse to believe that---*sees in the credits that the character was actually "Matt Boyd"*---Oh. Nevermind.
- Kelly Brook. Yum.
- Christopher Lloyd was great. It's a shame he had such a small role.
- ...I recognized Gianna Michaels. I have officially been on the Internet too long.
- I have no problem with bloody movies. I love the Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elm Street series. I thought Kill Bill Vol. 1 was awesome. I think it's stupid when the monsters don't bleed in Godzilla movies. But this movie... Is it me, but was this movie unnecessarily gory? I was fine with it at first, but the scene where the piranha attack the partiers was just too much. Around the time the guy's head was crushed by the oncoming boat, or the girl had her face ripped off by the propeller, it had crossed the line from "This is awesome funtime monster movie gore!" to "Dude... that's... that's disgusting." By the time the girl being carried ashore fell in half, I had officially lost interest and felt a little sick.
- Is it me, or did the camera guy just disappear? I only remember Jerry O'Connell and the blonde chick getting eaten.
- ...Really? Did we really need to see a piranha puke up Jerry O'Connell's half-eaten penis? REALLY?
- Once Jake tossed Jerry O'Connell's remains into the water, drawing the piranha away, was there some reason Kelly couldn't just walk out of the room, out the door, onto the top of the boat? Why did Jake have to go under the boat to rescue her?
- I think I almost shed a (manly) tear when Ving Rhames and Kelly Brook "bit" it.
- Nice ending ("They're just the babies!"), though I kinda wish they'd done a little more with it before the movie was over.
So, yeah. Fun movie. Way too much gore.